A Nassau County legislator proposed a bill Wednesday aimed at barring convicted sex offenders on probation from having computer access to social Web sites where they could prey on youngsters.
Sex offenders who used a computer in their crime could be required to register their computers with the county and allow the installation of monitoring software as a condition of probation, according to Nassau County Legis. David Mejias, who proposed the measure.
Facebook, MySpace and some other sites have already agreed to block sex offenders who are on a state database. But this proposed bill would allow monitoring of sex offenders not on the state list and expand the barred sites to game rooms and other potential meeting places, Mejias (D-Farmingdale) said.
FULL ARTICLE @ NEWSDAY
5.30.2009
open marriage
Has anyone heard of the term "open marriage". The first time I heard it from a gal at the party we visited the other month. She was flirting with one guy and when she saw me lifting my eyebrows, she said she has an open marriage, apparently, open marriage means when you tell your spouse that you want to sleep around with someone else. It seems that honesty is the basis of this relationship where in the couple are honest with one another in expressing their attractions to someone else and then ask the other partner if they are okay with them sleeping with someone else. I personally feel that the open marriage stuff will fly only for movie stars and those type of people where morals are defined differently. Even, the most liberal person who is open to gay and lesbian relationships would want to have their partner exclusive to themselves all the time.
5.29.2009
Forced marriage
Forced marriage is a term used to describe a marriage in which one or more of the parties is married without his or her consent or against his or her will. A forced marriage differs from an arranged marriage, in which both parties consent to the assistance of their parents or a third party (such as a matchmaker) in identifying a spouse, although the difference between the two may be indistinct. The practice of forced marriage was very common amongst the upper classes in Europe until the 1900s and is still practiced in South Asia, the Middle East, and Africa. Forced marriages now in Western Europe and North America are generally committed within these migrant communities. In most but not all forced marriages, it is the female (rather than the male) who is the involuntary spouse.
Forced marriages are generally made because of family pride, the wishes of the parents, or social obligation. For example, according to Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood, many forced marriages in Britain within the British Pakistani community are aimed at providing British citizenship to a member of the family currently in Pakistan to whom the instigator of the forced marriage feels a sense of duty.For example, a mother promised her sister that she would marry her daughter to her son before the daughter was even born.
Western society and the United Nations view forced marriage as a form of human rights abuse, since it violates the principle of the freedom and autonomy of individuals. The Roman Catholic Church deems forced marriage grounds for granting an annulment — for a marriage to be valid both parties must give their consent freely. Many Christian denominations consider forcing a person to marry someone a sin.
In response to the problem of forced marriages in the UK, the Forced Marriage (Civil Protection) Act 2007 was passed, which enables the victims of forced marriage to apply for court orders for their protection.
Historically, forced marriage was used to require a captive (slave or prisoner of war) to integrate with the host community, and accept his or her fate. One example is the English blacksmith John R. Jewitt, who spent 3 years as a captive of the Nootka people on the Pacific Northwest Coast in 1802-1805. He was ordered to marry, because the council of chiefs thought that a wife and family would reconcile him to staying with his captors for life. Jewitt was given a choice between forced marriage for himself and capital punishment for both him and his "father" (a fellow captive). "Reduced to this sad extremity, with death on the one side, and matrimony on the other, I thought proper to choose what appeared to me the least of the two evils"
Forced marriages are generally made because of family pride, the wishes of the parents, or social obligation. For example, according to Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood, many forced marriages in Britain within the British Pakistani community are aimed at providing British citizenship to a member of the family currently in Pakistan to whom the instigator of the forced marriage feels a sense of duty.For example, a mother promised her sister that she would marry her daughter to her son before the daughter was even born.
Western society and the United Nations view forced marriage as a form of human rights abuse, since it violates the principle of the freedom and autonomy of individuals. The Roman Catholic Church deems forced marriage grounds for granting an annulment — for a marriage to be valid both parties must give their consent freely. Many Christian denominations consider forcing a person to marry someone a sin.
In response to the problem of forced marriages in the UK, the Forced Marriage (Civil Protection) Act 2007 was passed, which enables the victims of forced marriage to apply for court orders for their protection.
Historically, forced marriage was used to require a captive (slave or prisoner of war) to integrate with the host community, and accept his or her fate. One example is the English blacksmith John R. Jewitt, who spent 3 years as a captive of the Nootka people on the Pacific Northwest Coast in 1802-1805. He was ordered to marry, because the council of chiefs thought that a wife and family would reconcile him to staying with his captors for life. Jewitt was given a choice between forced marriage for himself and capital punishment for both him and his "father" (a fellow captive). "Reduced to this sad extremity, with death on the one side, and matrimony on the other, I thought proper to choose what appeared to me the least of the two evils"
5.28.2009
does love marriage exist in India?
According to Rigveda, there are 8 types of marriage. Love marriage falls under the category "Gandharvam". So love marriage is as old as at least India is. It is put under the sixth category. The seventh and eighth are proscribed. So love marriage seems to be the lowest in terms of order. I give below something I read recently.
"The old Hindu scriptures like Vedas say that among the couple there should be mutual trust, give and take attitude and loyalty, which are the essentials for a happy marriage life. In ancient time the marriages were not arranged by the family or elders. Grown up men and women used to choose each other and started staying together like the modern society.
According to Rig Veda there are eight types of marriages-
1.Braahmam : The parents chose the right spouse for their daughters.
2.Praajaapathyam :Groom wanted to marry to become a grahasthan for practicing Dharma.
3.Aarusham :The man approached to the bride`s father to have his daughter and offered two cows in exchange.
4.Daiveekam : When Yajna was performed the Kings used to offer their daughters to the Rishis who conducted the yajna.
5.Asuram : In this marriage the groom used to offer a lot of money or other forms of wealth to either the bride or her parents.
6.Gaandharvam : A man and woman falling in love marry each other out of lust.
7.Raakshasam: The process includes abducting a girl and marry her.
8.Paisaasam : It is getting married to a girl who is sleeping or unaware of what is going on due to the influence of drug or intoxication."
http://www.indianetzone.com/10/hindu_marriage_rituals.htm
"The old Hindu scriptures like Vedas say that among the couple there should be mutual trust, give and take attitude and loyalty, which are the essentials for a happy marriage life. In ancient time the marriages were not arranged by the family or elders. Grown up men and women used to choose each other and started staying together like the modern society.
According to Rig Veda there are eight types of marriages-
1.Braahmam : The parents chose the right spouse for their daughters.
2.Praajaapathyam :Groom wanted to marry to become a grahasthan for practicing Dharma.
3.Aarusham :The man approached to the bride`s father to have his daughter and offered two cows in exchange.
4.Daiveekam : When Yajna was performed the Kings used to offer their daughters to the Rishis who conducted the yajna.
5.Asuram : In this marriage the groom used to offer a lot of money or other forms of wealth to either the bride or her parents.
6.Gaandharvam : A man and woman falling in love marry each other out of lust.
7.Raakshasam: The process includes abducting a girl and marry her.
8.Paisaasam : It is getting married to a girl who is sleeping or unaware of what is going on due to the influence of drug or intoxication."
http://www.indianetzone.com/10/hindu_marriage_rituals.htm
5.27.2009
arranged marriage - a good way to marry and stay married?
Do they have a good success rate? Are people who get into arranged marriages
generally happy? Well, we did our interviews and got a wealth of feedback and drew two conclusions…They could either be good or they could be bad. Also, there were benefits to having or being in an arranged marriage.
) Arranged marriages take all the guess work not to mention the work out of trying to find a date or a husband/wife. Basically, your first date becomes your marital partner. Could you ever have imagined a first date leading to a 100% success rate for marriage?
2) You really don’t have to make a good first impression. Your first impression will be a lasting impression irregardless. If neither of you wasn’t impressed the first time you met, discuss it on your wedding night!
3) Since your parents and families do all the work and set things up, they become your personal dating/marriage manager. If you have any grievances, you are more than free and encouraged to take it up with them. Knowing this in advance and you being a constant complainer, I am sure they will make the best possible choice for you so they won’t have to listen to you whine and complain.
4) If it’s your brother or sister you are marrying, you won’t have to go too far to find their bedroom. Hey, back off! Don’t call us disgusting! This is what you told us! Besides, you probably will get along with your in-laws!
5) If you marry someone within your immediate family circle, your parents won’t have to pay for 2 marriages. In fact, the list from the bride’s relative list looks awfully like the groom’s list. Look at it this way… You get to save on postage stamps and envelopes!
6) If you come from royalty or not (just into incest anyways), everything stays in the family. When you decide to get married, you won’t have to worry about pre-nuptials!
7) Arranged marriages prove there is someone out there for everyone. No matter what you look like, where your self-esteem is at, someone will have to take you for better or for worse. We didn’t say they had to love you!
8) Perhaps arranged familial marriages are like fine family recipes handed down from one generation to the next. Stores can’t bottle it. Restaurants can try to copy it but it never tastes as good as grandma’s. And best of all what happens in the family stays in the family. Blood is thicker than water and secrets get kept! Damn, this is starting to sound like the Sopranos! Hey, nothing beats a 10 course meal!
9) You can never be accused of making a bad choice! Having an arranged marriage is like inheriting a turn-key operation. All faults are directed toward those who put the ball in motion.
10) You have a great chance for getting on one of those raunchy television talk shows if you marry your brother, father or grandfather. Hey, we’ve seen others on those shows who got their own reality TV series because of it. Wait a minute. Maybe the reality TV series was the talk show!
Most Indians can relate to the first part of the post. If you are born in India or an Indian born and raised in the US, you will surely have at least heard or had an arranged marriage. India is still one of those countries that has the record high of arranged marriages, no surprises there, though the divorce rate is also
slowly, but steadily creeping up in present times. What with the advent of outsourcing, BPO's, women working night shifts and having higher education and more financial independence, along with which comes lesser tolerance to put up with crap from a male dominated society, divorce is also happening more commonly these days amongst Indians.
The usual opinion is that arranged marriages happen only in the east but this was not always so arranged marriages were happening even in Victorian Europe. With the industrial revolution and the end of the 2 world wars people's attitudes and perceptions started changing as women started to join the workforce and they started to demand for their rights. In England for example most of the kings and queens had arranged marriages up until King George V the present Queen Elizabeth's father broke tradition by marrying a commoner. Besides popular love lore like Soni Mahiwal, India always had a long tradition of arranged marriages. With the advent of the British, and the subsequent introduction of British education system more Indians got educated. These educated Indians in turn started to send their children to school and tried to educate their wives at home. The cause of women's education and rights were also very much espoused by our social reformers. In spite of this the institution of arranged marriage persisted. Education and exposure to the media, started to make people to think and realize they need not be bound by tradition and they can choose their own marital partners without having to rely on parents, matchmakers, relatives or having to consult astrologers. This gave rise to love marriages. Currently in our country we have arranged as well as love marriages taking place.
One of the usual questions against an arranged marriage is that how can you marry somebody you don't know. Knowing somebody before marriage allows partners to have better respect and understanding for each other's needs and desires. This way they are better adjusted in the marriage when they finally take their wedding vows.
Coming to arranged marriages, they offer more protection, security to the women. There is not much pressure on the women to look like models. Parents employ maturity and wise judgment when choosing suitable spouses for their children. Sometimes it helps to rely on another person's opinion and experience when selecting one's partner especially when the people marrying are young and need guidance and advice in marrying a suitable person.
It becomes difficult therefore to predict the ideal sort of marriage. So ultimately it is up to the individual to decide whether he wants to have a love or an arranged marriage after all it is a question of being happy in love.
generally happy? Well, we did our interviews and got a wealth of feedback and drew two conclusions…They could either be good or they could be bad. Also, there were benefits to having or being in an arranged marriage.
) Arranged marriages take all the guess work not to mention the work out of trying to find a date or a husband/wife. Basically, your first date becomes your marital partner. Could you ever have imagined a first date leading to a 100% success rate for marriage?
2) You really don’t have to make a good first impression. Your first impression will be a lasting impression irregardless. If neither of you wasn’t impressed the first time you met, discuss it on your wedding night!
3) Since your parents and families do all the work and set things up, they become your personal dating/marriage manager. If you have any grievances, you are more than free and encouraged to take it up with them. Knowing this in advance and you being a constant complainer, I am sure they will make the best possible choice for you so they won’t have to listen to you whine and complain.
4) If it’s your brother or sister you are marrying, you won’t have to go too far to find their bedroom. Hey, back off! Don’t call us disgusting! This is what you told us! Besides, you probably will get along with your in-laws!
5) If you marry someone within your immediate family circle, your parents won’t have to pay for 2 marriages. In fact, the list from the bride’s relative list looks awfully like the groom’s list. Look at it this way… You get to save on postage stamps and envelopes!
6) If you come from royalty or not (just into incest anyways), everything stays in the family. When you decide to get married, you won’t have to worry about pre-nuptials!
7) Arranged marriages prove there is someone out there for everyone. No matter what you look like, where your self-esteem is at, someone will have to take you for better or for worse. We didn’t say they had to love you!
8) Perhaps arranged familial marriages are like fine family recipes handed down from one generation to the next. Stores can’t bottle it. Restaurants can try to copy it but it never tastes as good as grandma’s. And best of all what happens in the family stays in the family. Blood is thicker than water and secrets get kept! Damn, this is starting to sound like the Sopranos! Hey, nothing beats a 10 course meal!
9) You can never be accused of making a bad choice! Having an arranged marriage is like inheriting a turn-key operation. All faults are directed toward those who put the ball in motion.
10) You have a great chance for getting on one of those raunchy television talk shows if you marry your brother, father or grandfather. Hey, we’ve seen others on those shows who got their own reality TV series because of it. Wait a minute. Maybe the reality TV series was the talk show!
Most Indians can relate to the first part of the post. If you are born in India or an Indian born and raised in the US, you will surely have at least heard or had an arranged marriage. India is still one of those countries that has the record high of arranged marriages, no surprises there, though the divorce rate is also
slowly, but steadily creeping up in present times. What with the advent of outsourcing, BPO's, women working night shifts and having higher education and more financial independence, along with which comes lesser tolerance to put up with crap from a male dominated society, divorce is also happening more commonly these days amongst Indians.
The usual opinion is that arranged marriages happen only in the east but this was not always so arranged marriages were happening even in Victorian Europe. With the industrial revolution and the end of the 2 world wars people's attitudes and perceptions started changing as women started to join the workforce and they started to demand for their rights. In England for example most of the kings and queens had arranged marriages up until King George V the present Queen Elizabeth's father broke tradition by marrying a commoner. Besides popular love lore like Soni Mahiwal, India always had a long tradition of arranged marriages. With the advent of the British, and the subsequent introduction of British education system more Indians got educated. These educated Indians in turn started to send their children to school and tried to educate their wives at home. The cause of women's education and rights were also very much espoused by our social reformers. In spite of this the institution of arranged marriage persisted. Education and exposure to the media, started to make people to think and realize they need not be bound by tradition and they can choose their own marital partners without having to rely on parents, matchmakers, relatives or having to consult astrologers. This gave rise to love marriages. Currently in our country we have arranged as well as love marriages taking place.
One of the usual questions against an arranged marriage is that how can you marry somebody you don't know. Knowing somebody before marriage allows partners to have better respect and understanding for each other's needs and desires. This way they are better adjusted in the marriage when they finally take their wedding vows.
Coming to arranged marriages, they offer more protection, security to the women. There is not much pressure on the women to look like models. Parents employ maturity and wise judgment when choosing suitable spouses for their children. Sometimes it helps to rely on another person's opinion and experience when selecting one's partner especially when the people marrying are young and need guidance and advice in marrying a suitable person.
It becomes difficult therefore to predict the ideal sort of marriage. So ultimately it is up to the individual to decide whether he wants to have a love or an arranged marriage after all it is a question of being happy in love.
arranged marriage
One of my friends from India got into an arranged marriage, he is an IT pro and good looking smart guy, I would never imagine, he will be the one, married by arrangement. But here we are, he was married yesterday, his bride is a lovely very beautiful girl, could be a movie star or something, he says he is happy and in love with her, this all sound really strange for me, but I am taking his word for it and hope in a year or 10, they will be still happy and in love....
5.23.2009
American women lose their eligible single men to Russian women
So whats the deal with all the mail order Russian brides? I get three or four spam emails a week offering websites, women, sexy photos in bikini and all other exciting things about them.
I'm sure most of the men go look for a foreign bride because they are lonely and American women ignore them, I've heard some say many American men seek brides from Russia and Asia because they are demure and obedient to their men (BS)
I saw a study a few years back (around 1997) and was laughing my my teeth off:
Electrically
In Mexico most of the people have electrically. Russia varies from 65 to 75 percent in the cities to 20 to 30 percent countryside. Should note that most of Mexico had electrically before the U.S. did.
Plumbing
Most Mexicans have indoor plumbing. Less then 50% of Russians have indoor plumbing and it gets a lot colder in Russia.
Medical
Most Mexicans have better access to doctors. The doctors have better equipment, better training and better access to drugs.
Housing
Mexico, more space, better living conditions
Food
Mexico, more and better
who would in normal sense believe it? well actually some do and look for a single pretty little lady to rescue her from those terrible miseries. But personally, my bet is on the loneliness factor as the dominant reason.
I think Russian women are simply much less demanding then the Americans. It has to do with the economy and all this freedom. Its just like in Russia where drinking is a men's sport, in America women's sport is finding a guy who makes more money then the previous, does not ask to do any house work and so on. Its all based on the suppy and demand. In Russia a lot of men drink, so women lower their standards.
Is Russia a country of alcoholics? Of course not, there're men who drink a lot, especially in villages where, but in cities it's quite different. Of course absolute abstainers are very rare, but do you really seek for them?
There're no alcoholics among my friends-relations-co-workers-acquaintances-whatever. Oops, no - there's a driver from my previous work, who was almost always "after the birthday", "after my friend's wedding", "after a housewarming party" or just "after the weekend".
I'm sure most of the men go look for a foreign bride because they are lonely and American women ignore them, I've heard some say many American men seek brides from Russia and Asia because they are demure and obedient to their men (BS)
I saw a study a few years back (around 1997) and was laughing my my teeth off:
Electrically
In Mexico most of the people have electrically. Russia varies from 65 to 75 percent in the cities to 20 to 30 percent countryside. Should note that most of Mexico had electrically before the U.S. did.
Plumbing
Most Mexicans have indoor plumbing. Less then 50% of Russians have indoor plumbing and it gets a lot colder in Russia.
Medical
Most Mexicans have better access to doctors. The doctors have better equipment, better training and better access to drugs.
Housing
Mexico, more space, better living conditions
Food
Mexico, more and better
who would in normal sense believe it? well actually some do and look for a single pretty little lady to rescue her from those terrible miseries. But personally, my bet is on the loneliness factor as the dominant reason.
I think Russian women are simply much less demanding then the Americans. It has to do with the economy and all this freedom. Its just like in Russia where drinking is a men's sport, in America women's sport is finding a guy who makes more money then the previous, does not ask to do any house work and so on. Its all based on the suppy and demand. In Russia a lot of men drink, so women lower their standards.
Is Russia a country of alcoholics? Of course not, there're men who drink a lot, especially in villages where, but in cities it's quite different. Of course absolute abstainers are very rare, but do you really seek for them?
There're no alcoholics among my friends-relations-co-workers-acquaintances-whatever. Oops, no - there's a driver from my previous work, who was almost always "after the birthday", "after my friend's wedding", "after a housewarming party" or just "after the weekend".
Russian Woman convicted of alcohol breastmilk death
A baby in Russia's Far East died from his drunken mother's breastmilk after she downed half a litre of ethanol before feeding him, the region's investigations committee said after sentencing the woman this week.
Yelena Sinitsyna was handed a one-year suspended sentence and a three-year probation period for death by negligence of her four-month old son in the small town of Sretensk, near China and six hours east of Moscow.
"On 3 April between 2 and 3 pm, she drank half a litre of spirit alcohol. In her drunken state she then breastfed her son," the committee said. "The immediate cause of the child's death, according to a forensic examination of the corpse, was acute ethanol poisoning." Sinitsyna was given a relatively light sentence as she must care for her surviving toddler, it added.
Eighty percent of crimes committed in Russia are connected to alcohol consumption, the interior ministry said, citing a report it will publish soon. A spokesman at the ministry declined to comment on the Sinitsyna case.
The ruling court said Sinitsyna, if found to be an alcoholic, would receive treatment.
Russians are among of the world's heaviest drinkers and demographers often cite high alcohol consumption as a factor in the low life expectancy of Russian men.
Campaigns to discourage alcohol consumption have persisted throughout Russian history from the time of the Tsars and through the Soviet era.
Yelena Sinitsyna was handed a one-year suspended sentence and a three-year probation period for death by negligence of her four-month old son in the small town of Sretensk, near China and six hours east of Moscow.
"On 3 April between 2 and 3 pm, she drank half a litre of spirit alcohol. In her drunken state she then breastfed her son," the committee said. "The immediate cause of the child's death, according to a forensic examination of the corpse, was acute ethanol poisoning." Sinitsyna was given a relatively light sentence as she must care for her surviving toddler, it added.
Eighty percent of crimes committed in Russia are connected to alcohol consumption, the interior ministry said, citing a report it will publish soon. A spokesman at the ministry declined to comment on the Sinitsyna case.
The ruling court said Sinitsyna, if found to be an alcoholic, would receive treatment.
Russians are among of the world's heaviest drinkers and demographers often cite high alcohol consumption as a factor in the low life expectancy of Russian men.
Campaigns to discourage alcohol consumption have persisted throughout Russian history from the time of the Tsars and through the Soviet era.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
